Once my husband had moved out, as soon as the landlord found out, he put the house up for sale, so I was now going to have inform the housing association about my change in circumstances, this added more pressure to find somewhere quickly that was suitable for our needs.
I also visited my solicitor and started divorce proceedings on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour, I wanted this man out of my life! Funny thing is after he left he suddenly declared that he always knew our child was his and he wanted to visit her once a week.
So due to some advice from my solicitor I had to accept his visits, as she said even if I went to court to deny access, he would have more rights than me and would probably end up with more access than once per week.
So I had to agree with him to visit our daughter once a week. This pained me, after all the things he had said about her not being his and I had to accept it. Seeing him every week was painful and I felt physically sick at the sight of him, I honestly hated him.
I did think about having counselling but decided to battle through this with help from my family, looking back now I wish I had looked into it as I think it would have benefited me on the road to recovering from this journey.
Two years on I am now divorced and we are settled in a new property with a new life, my children are all doing extremely well and are happy that we are on our own. I still have to see him every week but now I have learned to tolerate him.
I must admit the hate for him hasn’t left me but I have to see him regardless so I just let it wash over me, so there’s no atmosphere around my children.
I’m looking forward to my future and hope eventually. I can meet someone who can restore my trust in men again.
I am living my life free from the abuse now and would encourage anyone going through similar, to speak out and share it, it does help once its not that big secret any more.
The End or maybe it’s the beginning…