Libido can be a scary word for us men, erectile dysfunction (ED) and premature ejaculation (PE) are phrases we don’t want to have to deal with.

Men are much less likely to seek medical advice and emotional support than women.  Many men prefer to research their ailments and health issues online. For men online counselling and online life coaching is very effective and its available anonymously online from your own home or work place, you can even talk your worries through with a male counsellor who will understand your concerns.

In this section I would like to offer information that will be helpful to men, it is not aimed at diagnosis, as only a doctor or physician can make a diagnosis on matters relating to medical health, but I do understand that seeking medical attention for some conditions can be difficult and embarrassing for a lot of men.

Often men feel a whole lot better by talking to another man who they can trust, I hope that you find the following information useful and if you feel that talking about it would help, then please feel free to contact me.

This online counselling service is completely confidential and because it is online, there is no possibility of embarrassment or additional stress.  Early diagnosis and treatment in the following conditions could save a lot of unnecessary stress and even your mental and physical well-being.

You can talk to Paul a male, qualified and experienced online therapist and counsellor anonymously and from the comfort of your own home or work place right now.

Myth Busting information about your manhood.

The penis, as you are no doubt aware, is used for urinating, making babies, masturbating and generally having fun with. You’re very lucky to have one so take care of it and stay safe.

Sperm, semen, spunk or cum is manufactured in the testicles and pass along the epididymis where matured sperm hang out. The epididymis is a microscopically narrow tube 6m long folded into a space of 5cm, an engineering masterpiece.

Just before you ejaculate the sperm travel along two narrow tubes of muscle called vas deferens. These meet with the seminal vesicles which are behind the bladder just above the prostate gland.

The seminal vesicles and the prostate gland add their own secretions to the semen. These fluids are alkaline which protect the sperm from the acids in the vagina. At orgasm ejaculation or cumming, the semen is propelled from two ejaculatory ducts along the urethra which runs the length of the penis and out of the urethral opening.

What is the Penis, cock, tool or old man made of?

The penis is basically three cylinders of spongy erectile tissue full of blood vessels. The urethra, the body’s outlet tube for both sperm and urine (although only one at a time), passes through the middle of the smallest of these, the corpus spongiosum, which is found on the underside of the penis. The corpus spongiosum expands at the tip to form the head of the penis called the glans. The glans is protected by the foreskin.

Why is my erect penis or hard on bent?

Every penis is a bit bent and a slight bend upwards is not just normal but more fulfilling for your partner.

You may have a problem if your penis is bent to the left or right so much as to make it difficult or even painful to enter your partner during sex. It could be condition called Peyronie’s. Bent willies are very, very common and generally do not cause any problem with intercourse. It’s a matter of finding what fits, so to speak. If the ‘bend’ is particularly bad, surgery can improve things.

Can I break my Penis?

It can fracture if it bashes into an immovable object when erect. The most common cause is probably the woman’s pubic bone. It can be healed through surgery and splints. But damage like this is not common.

E.D. (Erectile Dysfunction).

What Is It?

Impotence means that a man’s penis doesn’t get hard enough to have sexual intercourse. When a man cannot get or maintain an erection. The medical term is erectile dysfunction. This condition affects approximately 30 million men in the United States. Erectile dysfunction is not the same as premature ejaculation, which is ejaculating within 1 minute after initiation of intercourse.

The major cause of erectile dysfunction is Vascular (blood vessel) disease.

Erections happen when blood collects in the shaft of the penis. Vascular disease can limit the amount of blood flowing to the penis or the amount staying in the penis. Both can result in problems with erections. Blood vessels can be damaged by hardening of the arteries (atherosclerosis) or trauma. Vascular disease is believed to be the most common medical cause of impotence.

Nerve damage (neuropathy)

Nerves must be working normally for a man to get and keep an erection. Nerves can be damaged by diabetes, multiple sclerosis, prostate surgery or damage to the spinal cord.

Psychological factors

Psychological issues such as depression, anxiety, guilt or fear can sometimes cause sexual problems. A sudden loss of sexual appetite can also be as a result of psychological issues.

At one time, these factors were thought to be the major cause of impotence. Doctors now know that physical factors cause impotence in most men with the problem. However, embarrassment or “performance anxiety” can make a physical problem worse. Impotence caused only by psychological causes is found most commonly in younger men.


Many medications cause problems with sexual functioning, including drugs for high blood pressure, depression, heart disease and prostate cancer.

Hormonal problems

Abnormal levels of certain hormones, such as testosterone, thyroid hormone and a pituitary hormone known as prolactin, can interfere with erections and sex drive (libido). This is an uncommon cause of impotence.


A man with impotence has either a problem getting an erection or difficulty maintaining one. This usually interferes with sexual activity.

Impotence can happen suddenly or gradually. Some men slowly lose the firmness of their erections or how long the erections last. In other men, especially those whose impotence is largely caused by psychological factors, the problem may occur unpredictably and can improve at any time. Despite their difficulties with erections, men with impotence may continue to have normal orgasm and ejaculation without a full erection.


Psychological therapy such as counseling, behavioural therapy or couples therapy can be effective in men whose impotence is caused primarily by psychological factors. Online Counselling can help to reduce the embarrassment by offering anonymity to the client. You do not even have to give your real name. The sessions are confidential and secure online. If you would like to talk to a professional male counsellor, please click here to book a session.

Premature ejaculation

This is when a man ejaculates (comes) within two minutes of penetration. It is more common amongst younger men up to the age of 35. It tends to happen because a man is very aroused.

You can see your GP or a psychosexual therapist or talk to a Counsellor for confidential help.

What causes it?

Either just being very excited with a new partner, or an acute sensitivity of the local nervous system, which triggers orgasm too quickly.

What should you do if you have premature ejaculation or come too quickly?

See your GP, or a psychosexual therapist or a Counsellor. A counsellor will be able to teach you some techniques to delay ejaculation.

What treatment is there?

A lot of men and their partners don’t worry and work around it, But if you’re very unsatisfied, there are some things you can try.

Have sex again soon after the man ejaculates, and the second time it will take longer to reach an orgasm. Older men might find this difficult as it may take too long to get a second erection.

Creams available from sex shops can be put on the penis to numb sensation. This tends to transfer the numbing sensation to the partner, which doesn’t go down very well. Some find using a condom useful.

The man’s partner can squeeze his penis in a certain way to prevent him ejaculating. A man needs an extremely willing partner to do this, and some partners don’t feel comfortable with it.

Counselling can be very successful in terms of relaxing or exploring problems in the relationship, or with exploring a man’s sexual needs and urges.

If you would like to share your worries with Paul an online male counsellor in complete confidence, please feel free to contact me.

What is a prostate and why do men need it?

The prostate is the gland that is part of the male reproductive system.

The prostate is the gland that is part of the male reproductive system.

The prostate is the gland that is part of the male reproductive system. It is shaped like a walnut and is about 1.2 inches across. One of its functions is to make one of the ingredients of semen, the fluid produced during ejaculation. This fluid is called prostate fluid. This fluid also keeps sperm in a healthy, fertile condition in order for fertilization to be possible.

The urethra runs through the prostate gland. This is why many men with prostate cancer experience urinary difficulties and sometimes discomfort. If a tumor grows, it can put pressure on the urethra, ultimately slowing the flow of urine or not allowing the flow at all.

What is Prostate Cancer?

Prostate cancer occurs when the cells within the prostate grow uncontrollably, creating small tumors. The term “cancer” refers to a condition in which the regulation or balance of cell growth is lost and cells grow uncontrollably. Most cells in the body are constantly dividing, maturing and then dying in a perfectly controlled process. Unlike normal cell growth, the growth of cancer cells is no longer regulated correctly. Instead of dying as they should, cancer cells outlive normal cells and continue to form new, abnormal cells.

Abnormal cell growths are called tumors. The term “primary tumor” refers to the original tumor; secondary tumors are caused when the original cancer spreads to other locations in the body. Prostate cancer typically is comprised of multiple very small, primary tumors within the prostate. At this stage, the disease is often curable (rates of 90% or better) with standard interventions such as surgery or radiation that aim to remove or kill all cancerous cells in the prostate. Unfortunately, at this stage the cancer produces few or no symptoms and can be difficult to detect.

What is Metastatic Prostate Cancer?

If untreated and allowed to grow, the cells from these tumors can spread in a process called metastasis. In this process, prostate cancer cells are transported through the lymphatic system and the bloodstream to other parts of the body, where they lodge and grow secondary tumors. Once the cancer has spread beyond the prostate, cure rates drop dramatically.

In most cases, prostate cancer is a relatively slow-growing cancer, which means that it typically takes a number of years for the disease to become large enough to be detectable, and even longer to spread beyond the prostate. This is good news. However, a small percentage of patients experience more rapidly growing, aggressive forms of prostate cancer. Unfortunately, it is difficult to know for sure which prostate cancers will grow slowly and which will grow aggressively, complicating treatment decisions.

The spread of cancer outside the prostate can be detected by the presence of prostate cancer cells in areas surrounding the prostate such as the seminal vesicle, lymph nodes in the groin area, the rectum and bones. When prostate cancer spreads to another site, such as bone, the new tumor is still considered to be prostate cancer, not bone cancer.

How Common is Prostate Cancer?

It is the most common non-skin cancer in America, affecting 1 in 6 men. A non-smoking man is more likely to develop prostate cancer than he is to develop colon, bladder, melanoma, lymphoma and kidney cancers combined. In fact, a man is 35% more likely to be diagnosed with prostate cancer than a woman is to be diagnosed with breast cancer.

In 2008, more than 186,000 men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer, and more than 28,000 men will die from the disease. One new case occurs every 2.5 minutes and a man dies from prostate cancer every 19 minutes.

It is estimated that there are more than 2 million American men currently living with prostate cancer.

How curable is prostate cancer?

As with all cancers, “cure” rates for prostate cancer describe the percentage of patients likely remaining disease-free for a specific time. In general, the earlier the cancer is caught, the more likely it is for the patient to remain disease-free.

Because approximately 90% of all prostate cancers are detected in the local and regional stages, the cure rate for prostate cancer is very high nearly 100% of men diagnosed at this stage will be disease-free after five years. By contrast, in the 1970s, only 67% of men diagnosed with local or regional prostate cancer were disease-free after five years.

Yet being diagnosed with prostate cancer can be a life-altering experience. It requires making some very difficult decisions about treatment options that can affect not only the life of the man diagnosed, but also the lives of his family members in significant ways for many years to come.

As with any illness or condition, early detection offers the best chance of a sucessful treatment. A Prostate examination is not as bad as it can sometimes sound. A doctor or Physician will ask you to lie on your side, he will wear a surgical glove with a water based lubricant and insert one finger into your Anus, he will be able to feel the Prostate and make a diagnosis. This whole process will take no longer than a minute, and could save your life. So get it checked out.

If you are worried and would like to talk to a male counsellor online, in complete confidence, you don’t even need to give your real name, no-one will ever know you are seeking help and no records are kept of our chats. Talk to Paul now.

Professional and experienced Online Counsellor (Therapist) and Online Life Coach Paul Parkin’s Men’s health Counselling experience.

Paul Parkin Online Counselling, Therapy and Life Coaching.

Paul Parkin Online Counselling, Therapy and Life Coaching.

I am an experienced, professional online counsellor, with over 11 years experience working as a counsellor (therapist) and life coach offering confidential, affordable counselling online  to clients anywhere in the world.

By living a simple life and working from home I have reduced my costs enabling me to reduce the session fees for clients, making counselling online more accessible to people seeking counselling online.

I have worked in the field of men’s health and other male orientated health issues consulting for several years both face to face and online life coaching. I have helped Thousands of men who struggle with talking about private and sometimes, embarrassing issues. Talking to a life coach online offers men a safe, anonymous way to get professional and experienced help from another male without leaving the comfort of your home or work.

Have a chat with Paul

Hi Paul at counselors online – OK, here goes, every time I try to have sexual intercourse I just cannot keep an erection, it’s there but it just goes as soon as I try to get it on.

This has happened ever since the time my wife told me she has had a bigger penis than I have, since then I cannot do it. I am sure it’s all in my mind because I masturbate alone and there are no problems when I am alone.

Can you help? WOW that was hard to write, but not as hard as it would have been to say it face to face.

I am so Anxious when it gets to bed time, please help. This is a great online counselling service fella.I hope to get your expert help soon, I so need it and I must speak to a male counselor.


Hi JJ,

I am pretty convinced you are right. Your wife’s misplaced comment seems to have made you feel self conscious, maybe you were anyway? but this has tipped you over the edge. OK there are some things you and your wife should do, talk about it, get it off your mind, I can almost feel the stress you must be under.

Also I would like you to email me so that we can chat more, don’t worry I work online so you won’t have to say it face to face, just type as you already have.

Men find online counseling and online life coaching much easier in general, so online counseling works very well for most men.

Above all, this is not a long term issue, you just need to work through it with your wife and I can help you too, if you and your wife need to chat to me, I can help with that.

It may also help to have a look at the following information on Anxiety

Best wishes Paul, online counsellor (therapist) and online life coach.

Online therapy and online counselling – the benefits

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